Life is ONLINE NOW,Has it fallen in line to ensure peace and friendship ?

Computer,Tablet,or smartphone are  basically instruments borne out of modern technology  which can facilitate the exchange of ideas and interest and help  unite the individuals. Will exchange of information, rightly given or carefully calibrated and cleverly concealed or the beautiful photo taken decades ago or the political faith followed by the online partner would give peace and solace when they descend from the artificial virtual world to the real world.

Will the computer based data, the nature and content of endless chatting and emails,Facebook infatuation, midnight phone calls and so on are sufficient and strong enough  to  end up in a relationship eventually leading to marriage?

Without eyes meeting and the language of love spoken through eyes, will online romance lead to the  desirable destination?

Like a railway travel or visiting theater, will cyber intimacy cut the caste based isolation but remain very brief and short only to be easily forgotten; will gender based separation and discrimination and lessen the caste based honor killing spree? Will the caste based honor killing be exploited to further the election prospects as there is no worthwhile economic philosophy to propagate?

What happens to feelings, heart and mind when people marry late, or do not marry but regularly date, super date, never date or online date without any commitment ?Now life is  on line and the important question is, has it fallen in line in ensuring decent friendship and lasting love among the interested and  involved in the real world?

CYBER INTIMACY-SOUL MATE IN A BOX:PART 1

 In the recent months I have articulated very briefly on Thirukkural and also a few pages of translation from a Russian novel. The central theme was love and friendship which has become a scarce commodity now. Before I Plunge into kural again, I would like to make a digression on cyber love which will be a total contrast to the ancient way of love life. I have also started reading woman related issues in a non-fiction-Of woman Born, a fantastic piece on motherhood and related issues.

Recently I read something about SMIAB –SOUL MATE IN A BOX. This is all about the technology given choice to have intimacy and relationship- chatting, texting, emailing etc which we could not think of in our youthful days of 1960’s.

Cyber intimacy , if it is really helpful in facilitating  real  understanding  and meaningful relationship, a  lasting one too,  it is welcome  ;in technical economics language it saves the bother of search and transaction  costs in  uniting  the younger as well as the older segment of the population besides deepening the romance in zones which remained as a desert for long as possibilities were  restricted .

Physically apart and geographically distanced though, they are mentally fine-tuned; ideas and thoughts shared sometimes with false identity and many a time with correct identity and false promises fully hiding faces .Really a artificial and virtual world where the deeper desires and cravings are distilled and transmitted for instant satisfaction, happiness and well being. More on cyber intimacy will follow later.

Graham Greene's love letter made me remember Poet kannadasan

“Darling! Dearest heart for ever this is just a hasty line to say how much I love you. Don’t let anything ever make you doubt that. And forgive anything I ‘ve ever done to hurt you if this flight should end badly”

Difficult to guess who wrote this letter bristling with unbridled love? It was Graham Greene the famous writer who at one stage helped our RK Narayan to get his feet in the field of literature.

Going back to his hasty line ,was he true to his intention and ever love his dearest heart?No doubt his flight landed safely but our romantic in the novelist soon  after a brief interval landed himself into another sublime love with Catherine Walston a beautiful girl and also rich. What is true love and why the male irrespective of his status or qualification, appearance or look gets hijacked towards other greener pasture cannot be explained except by the genes the person has acquired and the outlook or attitude that he has developed.

Poet Kannadasan says :the heart has thousands of gates and innumerable thoughts arise there day in and day out;many will come and go but only a very few stay there. But when it comes to steamy affair with the opposite sex he says categorically that there will be problem if more than one enters into the heart  peace will cease to exist.

What happened to our Greene?In the company of that dazzling beauty he produced many great novels and she was definitely the great inspiration and a source of his happiness. All said and done that dearest heart also became the author of his sorrow and despair. Here the love gives pain and pleaure.The tendency on the part of the male to experiment and stray beyond multiple love has also started infecting at least a part of the current generation  of girls caught into the vortex of cross cultural exchange thus  entering into danger zone. Cyber intimacy and love has the entire fertile climate to fall in love and rise in life and or to fall into multiple love and go astray. If anyone thinks that  he or she will become Kannadasan /Greene they are in fool’s paradise.  

we will not die so long as we do work and also help the fellow human

What is the inner meaning of life? So many big arrows have been broken into pieces after hitting this question of rock. While ruminating over this debate / discussion now, I just feel like laughing. .

Absolutely there is no rationale or meaning in discussing this question without assigning any principal importance to work. If the routine daily work is snatched away from you and if there is no opportunity to perform honest work all the essential features of life will lose their meaning and flavour.

Oh life! What kind of thorn you are? You prick me in all directions.

There is no death for life. It is eternal and divine. A man or woman really dies only when he or she does not render any good act in life. Such a person incapable of doing any service to society would not merely die but meet the death of different kind  largely unnoticed.

Those who are incapable of beautifying this world through hard work would die perpetually for ever from the memories of people. Because there is no residual good act in them which will make their siblings and later, the series of  generations to remember their good deeds.

Life devastates the young couple;the deep love and respect rescues life and sustain it

SERGAI replies with all his lamentations:

“CAN you get real joy in life without stumbling on work that you love most and hence willing to labour. No use in talking...you are consoling me with all encouraging words treating me like a child. There are many beautiful and high sounding words and phrases glorifying about joy, happiness, the trials and tribulations of life and the manliness to surmount all odds in life. I have also read them.  I know full well that with all intellect and sharpness of mind they have been written to cajole the tormented and keep them in good humour. I am not interested in my own fate. My fate neither interests me nor affect. It has been already burned and turned into flames. You see..Why this girl, my wife and friend should suffer for no fault of hers. Who has given me the right to spoil somebody’s life?”

“Sergai, be brave and console your heart. Please, you do not suffer for my sake. Our life is going to start now, only from now. What matters most is that you are alive. That is most important to me. The rest of the things are in our hands. Happiness included”, She replied.

If one glance at this young couple, looking at each other and deriving peace and joy one cannot imagine and find it very difficult to believe that these were the very same couple on whom the tsunami waves and storms battered, bruised and devastated them.

Here is a young man whose hair has shown the traces of grey and the young girl who is just 20 have all experienced all  the cruelties and sufferings of life which are beyond the threshold level of tolerance and    human endurance ,but displaying a kind of serenity like the clean ,clear  crystal, clothed with tenderness and humanness. It is very difficult to believe that they had such a reciprocal feelings of love and friendship towards  each other, lasting forever.

A loving wife and a job satisfying the soul are sufficient in life

 “How can we relax when he is suffering with acute pain? He could very well die,” she replied. How much sadness was soaked in her voice when she uttered those words?.Her heart and soul cried for him though she hardly exhibited them outward and smiled.

Yes, a great suffering also gives a greater degree of courage-a brutal courage to confront it. Everyone cannot be a warrior like her. She is just 20.There must be a destiny/fate for everyone- a destiny exclusively belonging to him or her - a kind of private destiny.

“Sergai, you have a wonderful wife who is also your good friend. Going along with her you can surmount all the problems and definitely get a job-a work that will keep both of you engaged. Do you know one thing friend, happiness and joy are not something like a steam which could be bottled up in hand? They are available in abundance in real life. Both of you will have your own quota of that bliss, provided you are prepared to moderate and tolerate all your sufferings”.

TRANSLATION4;The secret of life is not to be cowed by the blows of life

The author continues:

Just now I was telling you that how those army men are also like us and what makes them special is that they fought for life with full heart and virtually sweated themselves out. I narrate this to you because all of us should not fail to struggle; till the end we should wage a war for the sake of life – to survive in life. The longing for and all the struggles of life are worth it.

It would be very difficult for both of you to accept what I say and yet you should shoulder the pain and bear it. My girl, don’t cry before him and make him feel that you are showering sympathy on him. That will weaken his limbs and self-pity will shake his determination and make him insane. This is the time when you must speak and show yourself before him as if nothing serious or calamitous event has taken place. I know it is easier said than done, and   very difficult for you to internalize this. But it is absolutely essential and important that you should act as I say and suggest.

When the life turns and transforms itself into a kind of stepmother’s behaviour, it kills men and torments life without any mercy or sympathy. The greatness and the villainous part of life lies not in getting bombarded and beaten by it but rather how you negotiate it. We should not be cowed down by the blows of life. There lies the secret of life.

Once the physical pain subsides and get moderated the man starts cracking his mind trigerring all the molecules of the brain.