Fusing Friendship into love and sex – An ideal Medicine for peace and bliss

“If two persons are into something by mutual consent, I do not find anything objectionable. After all this has to do with the very basic instincts in men and women, and artificial restraints cannot make much of difference,”says Bengali literatures Sunil Gangopadhay.

Unfortunately, in concrete jungles, hi-tech air-conditioned Ashrams ,I.T Parks,and exalted academic corridors, the crucial words “mutual consent” seemed to have been taken for granted and some recent and past episodes are shocking and disturbing.

More recently, the television Media unmasked the other side of one Swami, an young man found himself in a compromising position with an actress of South. Ever since that news channel exposed this scandal, the Ashrams of the said Swami have been ransacked, as general public is unable to digest the deeds of a person who preached sermons about Bhagavat Geeta and celibacy.

Gresham’s law meaning, the bad driving good from circulation seems to have entrenched more in politics and religion. I wonder why the scholarly Sways desire to lead an incredibly luxurious life and accumulate properties running into crores, perhaps even outsmarting the marginal propensity of enterprising politicians to earn money by all unscrupulous means under the Sun.


Long ago, a Vice-Chancellor of a University in the North was put behind the bars, for molesting a girl. When two people (students?) were sharing their privacy in Poona University campus, it was disturbed by a police man, asking their identities. He showed his arrogance and power against the powerless girl, after driving the boy from the scene. For these rascalised individuals, “sex is a monotonous routine like brushing your teeth” and they don’t have any guilt.

At other extreme is an interesting case of a girl cajoling a boy, to ‘maximize pleasure’, by obeying to the dictates of basic instincts. Then comes a bolt firm the blue from the boy that sex was just a “package in inter-personal relationship”, and he did not find anything objectionable, when she reciprocated. How can it be logically taken to marriage ? He merely asks .

Yes! Values have changed. Liberalizedand globalized Indians do not hesitate, to embrace permissive feelings, when former Chief Minister J. H. Patil’s wife was asked to comment on her husband’s fondness for wine and women, she merely replied: “He is free to do what he wants. Besides all this is so common these days”

Mr Clinton’s belated confession about his inappropriate relationship with Ms. Lewinsky, must have angered enormously his wife but she was quick to realize that her husband was “inescapably prone to infidelity and their ravenous political ambition” kept the marriage going. Raj Mohan Gandhi aptly summed up long ago: given an opportunity, there is always prosperity in a male to do mischief with a girl. The tendency towards impulsive, reckless flirt has become more pronounced, with the spread of globalization into the drawing room.


The older generation, brought up in a conservative mindset will be shattered and shackled by watching the incidents and reading the reports which they could never have ever imagined. Fortunately there are still many young boys and girls who are reasonably matured, smart and well informed about the inherent danger behind flirting. The opportunities to mix and mingle, to create magic and music might open the land mines, especially when they are starved of love and affection at home. When things go wrong, as they usually do, dreams turn into disappointments. Those who have walked with careless abandon realize the futility of short lived relationship, ending up on a weepy road.


“Sex was a sublime science in the Vedas, today it has become an appendage of a degenerate culture”, so goes a saying. Love and sex are important in life, as air and water, in adequate doses. While sex without love, is just a trade, one can envisage love without sex and the latter belong to the gene of friendship. If friendship is built into love and sex, that’s the ideal medicine for peace and bliss. But that is a very rare assemblage of tonic, available in today’s world.