A Few Auto Suggestions for Stability-From my dateless diary

Self admittedly, there’s no time to socialize, spend time with ailing wife or aged mother. Eating junk food, experiencing sleep drought, and not going for morning walk or more feverishly, more foolishly I have been blanketing with evening stroll ‘Dollar’.

This fierce romance with my discipline, my love, my passion, my feeling, makes me more diffident, nervous; while millions of butterflies are flying with infinite speed, in a tiny stomach, I understand that like Japan, I too have fallen into a bottomless pit of a prolonged tailspin of Academic depression.

The other day, when I narrated my academic woes and physical tiredness and inexplicable sadness clouding my thought process, my students showed me the light from what I have taught.

A few samples from their lecture:

Sir, while we decompose ‘Price effect,’ substitution effect always pushes in a positive direction towards enhanced demand in the wake of price fall. But unless ‘income effect’ is sturdy enough, it can’t outweigh helpful substitution effect.

“We know the campus chaos, the denial of your legitimate, academic entitlements, has caused much wrinkles on mind, nerves and all the complex circuit system of brain. The only way to get out of this cobweb of Academic Mischief is to go back to your roots: Your first and last love, our affectionate baby of International Finance; caress it, kiss it, gently embrace it, mildly pamper it. You have to just press the accelerator of friendly molecules in the brain, only to find the overflow of a substantiative stuff.

“Again to go back to your insightful lecture on Japan-A boat floating in Pacific Ocean, has the decade old depression, affected its currency, morale, credibility”. It will be always a good economy. Yen will be a candidate for purposeful stay for a longish period. Have some fun and yen and jest for life must come back to the academic arena and play your full game. You can’t go Tendulkar way of not finding rhythm.

I started off very well, teaching with passion and involvement, enjoying work and getting energized by it. At times even socializing and par-taking lunch with the souls pleasantly meditating on political manuvore.

The years rolled on. It was clearly evident, that the friendship was a farce. The laughter was not only meaningless but also sterile. Beneath the fair face, there was always something- ill will or hatred??. I tried my best to adapt and adjust to experience only minimal social tie. It was pretty disappointing at the end for having come to this world, lacking authoritative tone and arrogant behavior.

My gentlemanly behavior must have seduced them to do more mischief, carry tales, specialize in slander campaign. Give them a standing ovation. With all sheepish smile, with all inclination not to work, but carrying all ‘business work’ to office, and profusely relishing the pleasure of not doing work at workplace. For ages, these wise people have proved, work is not a necessary or a sufficient condition to climb up the Administrative/or Academic ladder. That’s the exclusive domain of ‘effective fools’.